There is this one part of my kitchen where my children cannot see me from either the sofa or the dining room table. Last night I find myself pressed up against this part of the wall silently pushing individual pieces of caramel corn into my mouth so my children cannot tell what I am doing.
Next thing you know Charlotte bolts into the kitchen (Damn her vulcan hearing!) and yells “What are you eating?” I start to choke and guiltily state “caramel corn.” “Who told you you could have that?” she asks. Wait, what’s happening I think. But I ACTUALLY answer her “Nobody, I just wanted a snack.” “It’s too late,” she says, “go brush your teeth.” Again, what’s happening? Who’s the adult here Cicero? Man up. But instead, I take another gulp of red wine and head off to the bathroom. #kidssuck